Ask the Bartender, Ask the Plants, Ask Karoline #73

VARIOUS STATES OF DISREPAIR...
    I’m always procrastinating when it comes to writing my column and this time is no different...except for the fact that it’s a hell of a lot easier to write about useful/medicinal herbs than it is to talk about the death of a friend. I still don’t know where to start so I guess I’ll just jump right in. Matty Luv passed away on October 5th in San Francisco from a drug overdose. I’m not going to go into any details, because I don’t know all of them and since I just moved back to Wisconsin, I wasn’t able to attend the services or the memorial. Suffice to say, getting sad news and being very far away from where it happened has made me very numb. I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of tears that just don’t quite come. I’ve spent the past week with all these mental snapshots of Matty running through my head...like stitching together a patchwork quilt of memories...things I haven’t thought about in years and they all come flooding back with astounding clarity. I really wanted to write something eloquent about Matty, like all the extraordinary columns about Sera over the past year...but I’m just sitting here staring at the computer screen. Nothing cohesive is forming in my mind. Matty was an absolutely incredible person. Sheer genius, unbelievably stubborn, hilarious, every night was his birthday and all he wanted was a beer, extremely depressed, a punk rock Buddy Holly, a trouble magnet, a sometimes shy Rock God, fantastic cook, an amazing musician, and oh so skilled in the lyric writing department. He was definitely a rubic’s cube...you thought you had him all figured out and then you just didn’t. It may sound corny, but my life is better because I knew him. My heart goes out to his parents, his brother and especially Aesop (who knew him better than any of us did). I know that there weren’t any squares at his funeral.

BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN...
    The one cohesive thing that IS coming to mind is this: we’re all just trying to get by in life and the most important thing (to me, at least) is that we’ve got to tell our friends and family that we love them before it’s too late. That may sound fatalistic and hopelessly sappy, but it’s true. I've had 4 friends die in the past 5 years and all of them were unexpected. I always assumed that I’d see them again and that was my mistake. Don’t take friends for granted. Don’t take your family for granted. Don’t take life for granted. We only get one chance and we’ve all got to help each other out...so share those food stamps and drink tickets and horrible puns and weird ideas and laughter and tears and overwhelming fears and fabulous daydreams and fucked up nightmares and absolutely anything you’ve got with the people you care about. SEIZE THE DAY!!! We’re not getting any younger.

CREPE PAPER HEARTS...
I’ll close with that appropriate description of how my heart feels right now. Take care of yourselves and I’ll be back to my regular column subject next time around. Oh yeah...if you’ve never heard of the band that was HICKEY, I highly suggest that you check them out. -karoline
roadiegirl@hotmail.com